arya stark, the westerosi equivalent of a gen z kid, in a casual conversation: yeah, i saw brienne beat the hound. what a mood. we stan a queen. wig = snatched. she just yeeted him off that cliff.
jon, a frustrated millennial who is coping with the fact that his sense of nihilism has been matched: what does that mean
davos, a baby boomer, who is trying to connect with the Youth: it means that brienne of tarth has Big Dick Energy, your grace
I would give all my money, my retirement fund, my health insurance, my home, to read this instead of the actual GoT books.
Final Fantasy II – Star Wars Where The Emperor Dies And Then Comes Back As The Devil And Then Dies Again And Then Comes Back As God And Then Gets Killed By Obi-wan
Final Fantasy III – Four Orphans Fight A Man Who Threw A Hissy Fit Over His Inheritance
Final Fantasy IV – Star Wars But The Emperor Is A Space Ghost On The Moon
Final Fantasy V – Evil Giving Tree And His Gay Lover Fight A Confused Harem Protagonist And His Princesses
Final Fantasy VI – Star Wars But The Emperor Is Killed And Replaced By The Joker Halfway Through, Racism is Bad
Final Fantasy VII – Eco-terrorists Recruit Man With Padded Resume, Discover Corporate Greed Has Caused Giant Meteor To Be Elected, Hold Recount
Final Fantasy VIII – A Group of Cadets Find Out They All Lived At The Same Orphanage: Amnesia To Blame, Lead May Be Dead
Final Fantasy IX – Star Wars But The Main Characters Are Either Clones Or Princesses
Final Fantasy X – Daddy Issues, the Real Sports Story, With Special Guest Christian Guilt Complex
Final Fantasy XI – Giraffe And Friends Stop The Writer From Erasing This Game
Final Fantasy XII – Star Wars But Half The Bad Guys Aren’t Actually That Bad. Except Judge Bergan, That Guy Is A Dick
Final Fantasy XIII – Being The Chosen One Will Kill Your Dating Life
Final Fantasy XIV – Heroes Saved The World From Bad Gameplay, Bugs
Final Fantasy XV – A Bachelor Party Goes Very Badly
jason to the batfam gc at 3am: @ duke @ babs this could be us but u playin (by the old mans rules)
duke: god i wish that were me
babs: im the girl in red who knew that had to be done
duke: im the girl in brown pretending to be shocked in case she’s caught on camera, so she can just say she was forced to participate and is left off the hook
jason: damn you’re good thomas
bruce: you know we can all read the groupchat right.
Shiro: They’ll probably say, “Thanks for gathering samples. But leave them behind. And one of your arms, too. Whichever one you like least.”
Pidge: Henceforth, rover experimental missions will be “Sirius” missions. Get it? Dogs? Well if you don’t, fuck you.
Keith: As you can see, this plan provides many opportunities for me to die in a fiery explosion.
Hunk: I ate the meal pack labeled “Survived Something That Should Have Killed Me.” Oh my god, I forgot how good real food tastes.
Lance: The rover and trailer regulate their own temperatures just fine, but things weren’t hot enough in the bedroom. Story of my life.
Allura: “Oh,” Lewis said, “well if you won’t let us then– Wait… wait a minute… I’m looking at my shoulder patch and it turns out I’m the commander.”
Coran: I can’t wait ’til I have grandchildren. “When I was younger, I had to walk to the rim of a crater. Uphill! In an EVA suit! On Mars, ya little shit! Ya hear me? Mars!”
so i was in a music store today and they were playing heavy metal music
specifically, heavy metal covers of the star wars soundtrack
let me tell you, there’s something about hearing a heavy metal rendition of the cantina band music that makes you feel like you’re having an out-of-body experience
so people have asked to hear it and y’all are lucky that i managed to snag a look at the cd on the counter (they display the one they’re playing)
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