Tag: himura kenshin

kakikaeru:

animaniacal:

whiteplum:

earl-of-221b:

whiteplum:

syolen:

whiteplum:

syolen:

whiteplum:

TFW you remember how, each morning througout the Tokyo arc, Kenshin woke up and made a conscious choice to stay in the Kamiya dojo even if he’s a wanderer.

You just had to remind us, didn’t you….

But wouldn’t his thoughts have been something like, “ah, yesterday was good, and Kaoru-dono needs me to go buy more rice today, and I promised I’d make her onigiri so she has a snack between classes at Maekawa-san’s dojo. Guess I’ll stay a little longer”, like he just lives day to day until one morning he realizes that he has been at the dojo for weeks and that… he likes it. He really likes it there. 

“Sano wants me to accompany him to the gambling hall today. And Tsubame-chan asked that we try Akabeko’s new meal tomorrow. Yahiko also wants me to watch him train. And I promised Kaoru-dono I’ll teach her how to make rabbit-shaped onigiri. Guess I’ll stay longer.”

*repeat every day until May 7, 1878 happens*

“Ah, it’s such sunny day, but no one will be around to do the laundry… I’ll do it. Kaoru-dono will want her bath ready for when she comes home this evening. She wants us to go see the cherry trees in bloom… she has a day off three days from now. We could go then, if the weather holds. Guess I’ll stay longer.”

AND THEN MAY 7th, 1878 HAPPENS. 

#you know this is so true that it kind of hurts  #he finds a small mundane reason to keep him at kamiya dojo and keeps finding them and suddenly the girls have labelled his room and #drew pictures on his wall and #there’s a polite note on the table telling him to run down and get some more eggs #and he has to make dinner tonight #and sano’s coming at 2 #when may 7 comes around its too fast too fast #he needed more time #he had a list of things left to do #show yahiko that one move he promised him #go to that kabuki show they’ve already bought tickets to #see their vegetables flower next week #he promised them small things #but there’s no more time #that ticking in his head has finally come to an end – like it inevitably would (via @earl-of-221b)

And then maybe, maybe, that preceding week, everybody who knows a speck of what’s going on bombards kenshin with favours. Kenshin, can you fix that creaky floorboard in front of yahiko’s room? Kenshin, can you pick out another tatami mat to replace the ones in the living room? Kenshin, can you show me how to make a paper lantern? Kenshin, spar with me, no exceptions! Kenshin, here, why don’t you order the food today? Anything on the menu. Anything at all. And Kenshin agrees to all of them because how can he not? How can he say no to these people who need him? Who love him? And all the while he knows he can’t fulfil all their wishes but he’ll swallow his tongue before he’ll refuse, and one day it feels like he’s no longer promising but telling white lies. It’s a week later when he’s doing the last lot of laundry and folding the clothes neatly, when he picks up his sword and it’s already time to take one last look at this dojo. 

For he – and he should have seen this coming, he knows he can’t trust himself – he was selfish for staying here for so long. How could he impede on their lives and live in their home and then leave marks when he knew he wouldn’t stay. He knew. From the very beginning, he knew this was only temporary, that unrest followed in his wake and there was a reason they knew so little about him, how he so wanted to keep it that way. He knew it all and he stayed. And he’s guilty for that. 

And everyone feels the tension after the events of May 7th but everyone — even Kenshin — pretends it does not exist. So he dutifully follows everything in Kaoru’s list of errands no matter how oddly specific they are. He shops for food even if their stock (her stock, he reminds himself) is still full. He lets Yahiko drag him to Akabeko and treat him to sukiyaki for the third day in a row. He humors Sanosuke when the younger man invites him for a drink and allows Megumi to tend to his wounds even if he has already recovered.

But he knows he has to go and he knows they may not want him back. So he finishes the dojo repairs as fast as he can, makes sure their meals are tastier, washes their clothes a little bit longer.

He does not know when he started to subconsciously make excuses to postpone his departure from the dojo, but, as the week goes by and as Okubo’s deadline approaches, Kenshin selfishly admits that he does want to stay.

#he takes one last look at the dojo #goes through all the empty rooms #sweeps some dust #and then he leaves without looking back – and he better not try looking back – he doesn’t have the right to #then he walks this village in one straight direction #until it’s nightfall #you know what? #maybe he was ready to leave just like that #and Kaoru was a fucking coincidence #he freezes and no way – no way in fresh hell – kaoru-dono is standing stark in his path #her back turned on him and her head lowered to see the water #leave – himura – you need to leave #you’ve streaked past battalions without so much as alerting the moths near their lamps #what the hell are you if you can’t get past one girl in the dead of the night #a fucking liar and a fraud too #he says #as his legs go to meet her and his brain is numbing and he does that trick he learnt in the military to never show fear and never show tears #by biting his cheek into shreds #rurouni kenshin: a wanderer that conned a nice innocent kyoto family for weeks on end #that is a huge goddamned mess #who ran into the love of his life like fate wanted to remind him #how dare you #and their reflection in the water as she hugged him harder than he’d allow himself to #look what you’ve done (via @earl-of-221b)

So he freezes when he sees her in Kyoto because he thought he would never be with her again. He left her so she would be safe, but in the end, it was her promise (”Let’s come home to Tokyo together.”) that saved him.

So you guys just want to murder me on a Monday, is that it?

Honestly what the fuck everyone?